101 wankers

The thing is you sound is that if for example I did help you from your attitude, I would be scorned for it, and it puts genuinely nice people off from helping someone because they may over thinking things because they are worried not about giving aid they are starting to overthink the situation and less likely to do something beneficial.

You wouldn't be - i'm very polite.

Seriously though, i didn't mean to put off people trying to help other people out, i realise it sounds that way. What you did sounds like a good thing to have done. What i was thinking of isn't an actual situation where someone else can come in and actually help by doing something, but is the more common (much more common to me, and i'm glad of that) thing where there is no situation beyond the insult /brief incident. Does that make sense? So when you then get someone trying to 'defend' you it isn't actually helping you (some would argue catching up and having a go might help the next person), and usually they are just talking about it anyway, like if you tell them about it when you get home. etc.

I fully support trying to help people, any gender, you see in trouble by themselves. I've done it and it wasn't what i was thinking of... just letting my grump confuse things i guess.