Spotted...

Skully: let me see if I've got this right.
You see someone that you describe as a 'poof' helping out another cyclist. Rather than just go on your way you decide to have "some fun". Not for the first time your idea of fun turns out to involve being gratuitously offensive and violent. Seeing that the cyclist has a flat tyre you take out your track pump and start waving it about like Michael Heseltine brandishing the mace, all the while laughing and making pssssssssssssss noises. Very mature, I must say. Then when the good Samaritan suggests that, rather than acting the giddy goat, you might actually help you reach in to your bag, take out a jar of pickled herrings and empty the contents over the poor man's head.
Finally, and God only knows what was going through your mind at this point, you tell the lady cyclist that your house is just down the road and maybe she would like to come upstairs and look at your Hetchins. Being, not surprisingly, rebuffed your final flourish is to push the now fish-stinking and half-blinded man in to the path of an oncoming Boris bike.
Why exactly is it that you have the need to boast about these incidents? Is rep really so important to you? Perhaps Skully (if that is your real name) it is time you simply grew up.

Did anyone set up a poll for that Grumpiest Bastard thread!?