Best Man Speech

Brevity, good humour and inclusiveness.

I can't stand rambling over-long best man speeches about the time the groom ate three kebabs and threw up on his shirt in a nightclub in shagaloof. Sat though a few of these recently. Funny only to the handful of idiots were there.

This is the answer.

Speak from the heart, Tomasito... cant go wrong.

Basically, it is a fucking great honour to have the chance to talk about your best mate and his new wife in front of all their family and friends. I knew it, and I said so.

I also referred to her as the following at various stages:

the hand brake
the anchor
the wet blanket
the ball and chain
she who must be obeyed

To be fair, she copped it more than he did! But she's wicked and one of my best mates too so it was all good.