Describe your favourite crash

[quote=Riss;265188] ...left leg elbow...quote] you mean knee?

Back in 1999 we had just left a pub at midnight on a Tuesday night pub run and it was pissin with rain really heavy.
I was last off after putting my lights on and as I caught up the group they were riding on either side of the lane, so I rode through the middle with my hands off the bars in a front crawl swimming motion.
Their laughter only fuelled my drunken stupidity so I unclipped my feet and hands on bars put my feet to the rear in a paddling motion.
More laughter so feet where they were I rested my shoulders on the bars and made a breast stroke motion with feet and arms, that's when the front wheel slid over a wet drain cover and sent me diving. :(

Luckily I wasn't going to fast and I was virtually in line for the judo roll so only a small scuff on my shoulder and a bent handle bar :)

Northern Rock

.....e ..p

The economy had been growing robustly for most of the so-called Roaring Twenties. It was a technological golden age as innovations such as radio, automobiles, aviation, telephone and the power grid were deployed and adopted. Companies who had pioneered these advances, like Radio Corporation of America (RCA) and General Motors, saw their stocks soar. Financial corporations also did well as Wall Street bankers floated mutual fund companies (then known as investment trusts) like the Goldman Sachs Trading Corporation. Investors were infatuated with the returns available in the stock market especially with the use of leverage through margin debt. On August 24, 1921, the Dow Jones Industrial Average stood at a value of 63.9. By September 3, 1929, it had risen more than sixfold, touching 381.2. It would not regain this level for another twenty five years. By the summer of 1929, it was clear that the economy was contracting and the stock market went through a series of unsettling price declines. These declines fed investor anxiety and events soon came to a head. October 24 (known as Black Thursday) was the first in a number of increasingly shocking market drops. This was followed swiftly by Black Monday on October 28 and Black Tuesday on October 29.

On Black Tuesday, the Dow Jones Industrial Average fell 38 points to 260, a drop of 12.8%. The deluge of selling overwhelmed the ticker tape system that normally gave investors the current prices of their shares. Telephone lines and telegraphs were clogged and were unable to cope. This information vacuum only led to more fear and panic. The technology of the New Era, much celebrated by investors previously, now served to deepen their suffering.

Black Tuesday was a day of chaos. Forced to liquidate their stocks because of margin calls, overextended investors flooded the exchange with sell orders. The glamour stocks of the age saw their values plummet. Across the two days, the Dow Jones Industrial Average fell 23%.

By the end of the week of November 11, the index stood at 228, a cumulative drop of 40 percent from the September high. The markets rallied in succeeding months but it would be a false recovery that led unsuspecting investors into the worst economic crisis of modern times. The Dow Jones Industrial Average would lose 89% of its value before finally bottoming out in July 1932.

Great general article on pro cyclists crashing by Bobby Julich, including a vivid account of one of his own crashes:

http://www.cyclingnews.com/features.php?id=features/2009/bobbyjulich_apr09

i fell off my bike (handlebar hit a railing), rolled around in the road a bit, looked up to see a car heading towards me, quickly moved out the way, my ankle got run over (by a mini).
i got back up untwisted my handlebars, looked at my leg, gave it a quick rub and carried on going. lucky it was a mini, i think the bus behind it would have caused alot more damage.
i went for an x-ray the next day and they said it wasn't broken but told me i had something inbedded in my foot. turns out i have a piece of glass in my foot from when i was a nipper.
its still there as they said they might cause more damage if they try to remove it.

I went for a ride after SE drinks the other night with my flat mate, Gormley, and coppithat. I was pretty fucked, probably shouldn't have been riding, but the stupid took over and I fancied a late night spin after some light persuasion from Festus, anyhow some random bloke also on a fixed joined in half way through our brief spin, I tried to chat to him turned around to ask his name, without realising how close I was to the curb with my skewed drunken judgement.....Anyway we were travelling at around 20mph as I caught my left pedal on the curb, stopping my bike dead, I then kind of went sideways over the bars, leaving my bike where it was and sliding for several feet along the pavement/footway on my shoulder, leg, and arm. Amazingly I got right back up with nothing other than a couple of friction burns and some minor bruising, it was funny because it must have looked/sounded really dramatic, but I got away with it, and rode away with a smile and a chuckle :)

A hearty "fuck you" to tram-lines.

If it's not enough that I dent my rims every time I cross over them, I also have to deal with getting my wheels stuck in them when I'm riding parallel to them. Happened a few times, with me coming to an abrupt stop as my back wheel goes in, but on Monday it was my front wheel's turn and I went over the bars and nearly got run over by a tram.

Roll on mag-lev trams. Or hovercrafts or something.

Commercial rd last night, two cars in front of me travelling at speed. I had a few dozen Tsing Tao at lunch so was playing MASH. The nearest car quickly went to anchors across to the curb. With lightening reflexes I checked my right shoulder and swooped around him like a buzzard.

I looked ahead only to see the box of kleenex sitting on the rear parcel shelf of a Mercedes. He'd braked to let a car out ahead, and I'd mown into the back of him. Rolled off his boot and smashed my knee on the ground.

Hobbled up to his window to apologise. He was a large Russian type. I was frightened.

He laughed at me and drove off.

My knee is fat. My bike is fine. I am a fuckwit.

It was the 12th of January, 2008 (Friday night). I was coming from Clapton, alone, had been helping a friend moving in to his new flat, I was absolutely knackered. After maybe 10 hours of carrying furniture, moving shit, cycling in freezing weather all day; we (3 of us) realized we haven't had anything to eat all day, just because of the urgency of the move... so it was a bit of a situation to do anything about it (it was past 2am by then).
I was living in Bethnal Green back then, so this was just maybe 2 miles from where I was. Right before leaving my friends flat we all decided to have a beer, Stella I remember (yuck!)... to top that, one of my mates had some lefts of some mad weed with him. We all sat down for the 1st time after large hours of work, had a beer, shared a smoke, and I rode off. I was the first to leave.
When I got to London Fields (around 3am) i took my hands off the handlebars, it was normal back then to cycle no-handed... the next thing I remember i was leaning against the playground fence, metal bars fence. for those who know London fields, there is that kids playground, next to TdV, that's where it happened, towards Broadway Market.
Basically my brain switched off the minute I took my hands off the handlebars, next thing I was trying to hold myself to the fence, which i failed monumentally, the arm got stucked between the bars and that pulled my all body against the metal bars, face 1st.
It was the same as opening my upper lip with scissors, it slashed it in 2.
It was an absolut facepalm of an accident... besides, I had to walk (I was completely numb), to Mare St. where these fellas took me as a drunk guy that had been fighting. No one helped me, instead I was mocked about by some drunk people passing by... really fcking frustrating.
Had to keep cycling with a blood fountain right on my face, got home, my GF nearly collapsed looking at me, went the Royal in Whitechapel...waited for 3 hours to be seen, and had to be stitched by a grumpy doctor that kept saying he was a doctor and not a nurse.... lesson learned.
If you gonna crash take someone else with you.

falling over while track standing clipped in but managing to grab a lampost on the way down which turned out to be a bad decision as, instead of ending the fall straight away, it continued for another 30 seconds with my feet twisted in pedal straps while I tried to push myself back up.

EDIT nuknow's description reminded me a a bad crash I had a couple of years ago:
I was cycling round by the north circular near tottenham hale at about 2am in a cycle lane. I came upon a long straight and decided to really go for it when this prat ambled into the cycle lane from behind a bush on a phone (he was on a phone not the bush). I was going too fast to handle the tiny 3cm high cycle lane curb which I didnt see had just apeared and without loss of momentum my bars span right round with my hand jammed in the brake lever while i simutaneously fell flat on my left side. I remember seeing the ground pass along very fast just under my left eye and thinking it looked cool. I wasn;t wearing a helmet and got a black eye, badly grazed cheek, shoulder and knee, and fractured wrist. It ripped a hole in my jeans too. I still have to see osteopath about my left shoulder which is full of scar cartilage and gives me tension headaches most weeks.

^^Yes, and one of those as well.
(on a traffic light with maybe another 2 or 3 fellow cyclists also track standing... and they laughed..: ( )

cycled home from christmas lunch pretty damn leathered... it was snowing near my house so I started doing loads of silly skids culminating in a super skid right outside my house where I fell off giggling and made a snow angle before I realised how fucking cold it was

Long time (and several crashes) ago, doing motorbike courier work, screeched to a halt in front of the big theatre in victoria, kicked down the side stand, lept off in best "I'm so farking cool" style, and fell over as I was so tired I only thought I had put the stand down.

Plus points: No bruises except to my ego.

Negative points: Bus stop about 3 metres away with about 20 bored and laughing peds.

Sigh.

....and made a snow angle ....

What, 104.5 degrees?

I was heading South from Regents Park to my girlies place after a few (too many) beers. I had three corners to negotiate...I cut the first one too tight and hit the curb, flying off but landing safely without injury. The second corner, I took too tight again and hit the curb. Luckily I was able to land much the same as i did on the first corner. No Injury. While cycling at speed to the last corner I chanted "don't cut it tight, don't cut it tight...etc" As I entered the corner I stayed away from the curb, but didn't think to look at the scaffolding surrounding the corner. My left shoulder struck an upright, my body was thrown from my bike and forced me to complete a flat 360 spin in the air before i landed in a crumpled heap. I stumbled into the nearby hospital where they begrudgingly patched me up (I didn't know it was a womans only hospital) The bruises and grazes healed, but the scars and the memory of why not to cut corners have lingered on 20 years later.

Well.. my favorite must be the recent one. An hour ago i was doing my usual white city to windsor home to work routine, A30 turning point to airport terminals, was rolling on dashed line which goes straight and fucking cars turning to terminals just before my nose tip. so decided to turn in with them and turn out when it is quieter. So i turned around to see if there was anyone behind me.. and this fucking thing went past me at 70mph which shoved me straight on to the kerb.. spin in the air or two.. woke up on pavement which also appears to be cycle lane.. couple minutes of flying stars and very blurry conscience. packed my shit together to find out that my three day old newly built track (James from BLB done pretty well on it) bullhorn right handle bent up to brake lever. Thought, wtf uses front brake anyway. Strangely, left one was bent out to the opposite side as well. Shooted of whilst admiring my newly customized steering gear. That was a pretty close one. I cheer

yeah, have to admit- cycled to hammersmith hospital a%e next morning to collapse there with tonic clonic seizure movements, unconscious for 8 hours on life support system, but all is good now except the anti epileptic drugs they issued me and a cycling and driving(!) ban. the drugs make me depressed or is it cycle that i miss?

tram tracks + rain + brand new shiny tyres = fail.

Probably not your favourite crash. Just your most recent.

Needs a diagram with some kangaroo poo, in the appropriate thread natch.

my arse hurts

my arse hurts

Is that related to the crash?

^ not actually funny :(

Parrot beaks are fucking sharp!

anyone else got any bum jokes? eh?

insensitive pricks. i fucking fell off my bike.

:(