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@NurseHolliday
Ha! That's going to haunt me. It came to me on the back of a scene I witnessed in Romford where two guys were arguing about who would win in a fight. One said he was from Dagenham, the other was too. One was from "East", to which the other replied, "Heathway", mid-headbutt. The guy from Dagenham East lay on the floor bleeding profusely, and the guy from Dagenham Heathway stepped over him and into the kebab shop to order, and I quote, "One of them donner things. You know, with the stuff that looks like dog shit but tastes like my bird's fanny."
Why are you in the countryside? Have you been banished for looking too unkempt?
Say hello to the sheep for me.