Bike Chat-up lines

I'm about to be a father, my pick up line (literally) was "would you like
a piggy back"...

That's a line on this thread that's worked, I'll have me spudds thank you :)

I will need corresponding evidence supplied by the Pickee...

'Your saddle smells lovely'

NB: it is best to do the sniffing whilst the owner is not around, doing it in front of them tends to freak them out

Sound advice right there

Nice bike, fancy a shag?

Class!

Oh, good grief. Ignored.

worked for me.x

You fancy a pump?

nice front rack. have you had your tyres inflated?

Is that a Colnago in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?
*obv. only one for the colnago riders....
I won't be trying this either, but feel free....

have you had your tyres inflated?

Cos it looks like you could do with a quick pump in the rear...

Cos it looks like you could do with a quick pump in the rear...

HA!
sicko.

I double-dog dare you to say that to a well-endowed lady next time you are on the road. I would love to find out what the reaction would be.....

Sem! I'm a married man! I'm just passing on the knowledge to my cycle brothers and sisters.

life and riding through London would be so much more hilarious if people said these things to each other on the way to work!

Are you running the SS side of your flip flop? Come over to mine and i'll flip you over and fix you up...

life and riding through London would be so much more hilarious if people said these things to each other on the way to work!

Indeed, a national pick-up line day is needed

Hey there jimbob....Just a word of advise....Tighten up your chain a bit. Hmm. A lot actually. Oh, and your saddle is way too high, isn't that painful for you? Listen, no offence, but I'm guessing you are new to all this, and you're kinda hot. Fancy a beer or two? We can fine-tune your position later.........

Are you running the SS side of your flip flop? Come over to mine and i'll flip you over and fix you up...

Dirty, funny and relevant: Genius.

Hey there jimbob....Just a word of advise....Tighten up your chain a bit. Hmm. A lot actually. Oh, and your saddle is way too high, isn't that painful for you? Listen, no offence, but I'm guessing you are new to all this, and you're kinda hot. Fancy a beer or two? We can fine-tune your position later.........

Patronising and (no doubt) sexist.....should work.

'Your saddle smells lovely'

NB: it is best to do the sniffing whilst the owner is not around, doing it in front of them tends to freak them out

Search youtube for 'vulva commercial'. It is absolutely acceptable to be turned on by this.

Hey there jimbob....Just a word of advise....Tighten up your chain a bit. Hmm. A lot actually. Oh, and your saddle is way too high, isn't that painful for you? Listen, no offence, but I'm guessing you are new to all this, and you're kinda hot. Fancy a beer or two? We can fine-tune your position later.........

Hey Sem, you used this one yet? I reckon you'd be in.....

We can fine-tune your position later.........

Zing!

Search youtube for 'vulva commercial'. It is absolutely acceptable to be turned on by this.

You bought some then?

He liked it so much he bought the whole company...

How do you think they collect the stuff in the bottle?

The sad fact is that most people on here would start mumbling some long rambling and nerdy technical question about the set up of her bike or the provenance of one of its components while the woman in question either fell fast asleep or rode off at speed.

Who said anyone was chatting up a woman?

Good point otherwise

'Your saddle smells lovely'

NB: it is best to do the sniffing whilst the owner is not around, doing it in front of them tends to freak them out

this is definitely my favourite so far

you freak :P