Happy slapped by toerags on a moped

A year ago Matthew Paris advocated using piano wire to decapitate cyclists. Let's not lower ourselves to his standards. Indeed his suggestion may well have led to a considerable increase in the assaults on cyclists.

Although stolen, reporting the number plate to the police could help them track a stolen moped or, and most importantly, would provide evidence of a further assault should the criminals be apprehended for another offence and thus allow them to be dealt with more harshly.

...yeah before being given custard creams and a and a nintendo DSI