Trade: Wanna swap your bike for a blad?

Before I dip in my pocket, I'd like to ask, if anybody here would like to trade?
I'm keen to swap my chromed beautiful Hasselblad worth at least £550 for a ss/fixed gear bike.
I'm looking for something nice and shiny, maybe chromed forks, with lovely stickers spelling words in Italian, simple, good looking, quiet, smooth and fast rider, preferably newish, open to your suggestions. I must look good on it while answering my iPhone, so Aerospoke would also suit me. It shouldn't be green. Or perhaps someone can help me with a build if I supply few bits and bobs, because as a family guy, I'm busy and - to be honest - technically impaired (I can talk the talk, but have problem with walking the walk).

p.s. I also have a brand new wooden large format pinhole camera with a film holder, polaroid holder and some 4x5 polaroid film worth more than £200 to chuck in the deal instead if you prefer and top up with usualy very popular cash.

Is this a joke?

I suspect not. Google the username and ye shall find a web site of the same name, and a blog, all about cameras.

You'll need to say what size frame you're looking for, Mr Images.

Yeah, I mean you'd look shit answering your phone if you had more than 5 spokes, right?

I must look good on it while answering my iPhone, so Aerospoke would also suit me.

At least you're honest.

I can talk the talk, but have problem with walking the walk

bit short on detail. 500cm? 500c? 500classic? 503cxi? 503cx? 120? 220? 6x6? 645? 80mm?

italian+spok= POC

doesn't fuckin matter, maaan, it's a big fuckin camera, it's a hassle fuckin blad, bro. in the fuckin east end. and he needs a fixie fuckin right now maan! so quit stallin and do it!

word.

I agree with him, you cant look cool unless your rocking a fixie skidder with a arrospok which isnt green (eugh) and the frame has to obviously have cool Italian wordz and shit on it
for £550 we can also supply you with the Fakenger™ kit, this comes with a Timbuk2 curryer bag and Fake Radio to make you look like a curryer!

Best wishes,
Arrospok Dealerz & Fakenger™ Kit

Do fakengers actually exist?

thanks, I knew I can count on you, sarky bastards! :-)

and seriously, I'm after a lightweight, rust free bike with a racing frame suitable for a slightly overweight and not very flexible 5'11" guy with regular lenght legs (32-33 inches - depends if measured in the morning or late evening), no gears.

I can sell camera on Ebay, but I though perhaps I'd start here and make someone happy, someone who's knowledgeable about cycling and bike mechanics etc.

and no, I don't wear drainpipes, I don't roll up my slacks, I don't live in Shoreditch

portraiture is really not your strong spot huh?

By the way, I was very disappointed you had a camera for trade, and not a swaggering London teenager in Reebok pyjamas with a fake accent and bad attitude. Blad.

thanks, I knew I can count on you, sarky bastards! :-)

and seriously, I'm after a lightweight, rust free bike with a racing frame suitable for a slightly overweight and not very flexible 5'11" guy with regular lenght legs (32-33 inches - depends if measured in the morning or late evening), no gears.

I can sell camera on Ebay, but I though perhaps I'd start here and make someone happy, someone who's knowledgeable about cycling and bike mechanics etc.

, goand no, I don't wear drainpipes, I don't roll up my slacks, I don't live in Shoreditch
well, depending on your deffination of stiff, maybe go with oversized alu tubes for maximum stiffness, mind you will comprimise ride quality, £550 will get you plenty of bike! size-wise im retarded so il wait for someone else to comment on that, might be worth telling us your inside leg legnth. . . imo go for 531 frame or 653 if you can get it on the cheap, get a old road double for crankset and get help with chainline and then £150 on wheels (including build, on one hubs to open sport are a good choice) and voila. . .

503 cxi No 11ET10592, chrome T* 80mm f/2.8 No 5514193 (EV numbers slightly rubbed off), new type WLF, A12 back No RS3165865 (I'm not sure if matching insert, as the film loaded still inside), crank winder
for the whole bike
or

noon pinhole 45j - vienna edition 60mm (107 deg viewing angle) f/188 , cherry wood, toyo 4x5 holder, polaroid 545 holder, packet of T57 4x5 b&w polaroid film exp. 10/06,
for the frame

well, depending on your deffination of stiff, maybe go with oversized alu tubes for maximum stiffness, mind you will comprimise ride quality, £550 will get you plenty of bike! size-wise im retarded so il wait for someone else to comment on that, might be worth telling us your inside leg legnth. . . imo go for 531 frame or 653 if you can get it on the cheap, get a old road double for crankset and get help with chainline and then £150 on wheels (including build, on one hubs to open sport are a good choice) and voila. . .

I don't think you've particularly understood the man wants a ready-to-ride swap here.

it depends. I just can't build it myself.

chris crash => who cares if some pay for it

Someone in a recent thread stood up for you by using the phrase 'we all started somewhere'. It is somewhat ironic that I'm now going to tell you the same thing.
it was a joke wibble, and then i offered him advice a few minutes afterwards . . .

well, depending on your deffination of stiff, maybe go with oversized alu tubes for maximum stiffness, mind you will comprimise ride quality, £550 will get you plenty of bike! size-wise im retarded so il wait for someone else to comment on that, might be worth telling us your inside leg legnth. . . imo go for 531 frame or 653 if you can get it on the cheap, get a old road double for crankset and get help with chainline and then £150 on wheels (including build, on one hubs to open sport are a good choice) and voila. . .

@east end images - im sorry, i forgot/didnt realise you were looking for a whole bike, but if you do decide to build up a frame (which it sounds like from your first post you might be willing) i hope what i have said offers some good advice :)

wtf, wheres your post gone wibble, i sound like a retard now xD

I might be interested in that pinhole camera, mind. How much?

Why can't you build one up yourself?

sharkstar, are you looking for a body (well, it's a box) or the whole kit with one/both of the holders?
camera itself costs new between £95 and £125, but I'd sell it for around a hundred with both holders and throw in the film for free.

there's on on Ebay without a holder - perhaps you can get it for less than I did?:
http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/LARGE-FORMAT-PINHOLE-CAMERA-s-n-146-noon-pinhole_W0QQitemZ260461356512QQcmdZViewItemQQptZUK_Photography_Film_Cameras_ET?hash=item3ca4b4e5e0&_trksid=p3286.c0.m14#ht_6538wt_1049

There are so many threads that are killing me right now lol, thanks!

Why can't you build one up yourself?

have you tried to do anything having a two years old baby around you? :-) I'd need some guidance anyway.

Is it the same make as the one on the 'Bay - limited edition job?