Numpty question about frame types

Thought I'd post it here cos I reckon I'll get a better class of insult here.

Is there a simple guide to what the differences are between road, track, audax, cross etc? I was tempted by a track frame but was worried that it would useless on the road.

Please put me out of my misery so that I can spend money I don't have.

If only there was some on line resource that didn't involve us...

http://www.sheldonbrown.com/

Is there a simple guide to what the differences are between road, track, audax, cross etc?

There most certainly is, my good fellow, it's here.

Thought I'd post it here cos I reckon I'll get a better class of insult here.

Indeed, you baboon-feltching nebuloid excuse for a vegetable-brained spannerhawk.

3 post and not a single utfs you fucking moron!? Guys you're slipping !

3 post and not a single utfs you fucking moron!? Guys you're slipping !

You clearly don't recognise subtlety then?

Thanks guys you're all stars

Indeed, you baboon-feltching nebuloid excuse for a vegetable-brained spannerhawk.

Nice, somehow I feel you know me already.

I was tempted by a track frame but was worried that it would useless on the road.

a lot of people on here seem to manage riding unsuitable bikes for journeys to the shops/pub/work etc.

it's all about bits.
track frames - very tight clearances, rear fork end.
road bike: add rear dropout with derallieur hanger, and drillings for brakes front and rear. lower bottom bracket. possibly braze-ons for bottles gears and cables
touring frame: add wheelbase to allow bigger tyres and mudguards. Add braze-ons for mudguards and possibly luggage racks and kickstands.
Audax frame - add the name "audax" and possibly braze-ons for cantilever or disc brakes
cross frame - erm...

Thanks BQ

Track frames tend to have a shorter wheel base, a higher bottom bracket, a steeper seat tube, and a shorter top tube.
This gives the rider an aggressive position, and the bike very sharp, responsive handling. something which is often considered less ideal for longer journeys.

Road bikes have a lower BB (adds stability) and a slacker seat tube angle, and more stable handling. Although the agressiveness of the handling/riding position varies greatly.

Sportive/audax etc are basically the same as road frames but with braze-ons as BluQuin mentioned and often a slightly longer wheel base, and taller head tube, for a more relaxed riding position, and an easier stable ride.

Cyclo cross frames, are basically road frames with higher BBs (for off-road clearance), canti brake mounts and clearance for bigger tyres.

I ride a track (well trackish) frame for fun and a cyclocross frame for commuting. Both have high BBs, both fit me perfectly, but the track frame leans me forward more, and the cross frame feels more stable.

The difference is pretty big so I'd advise that you read around, and decide what you atributes you want before splasshing out.

http://www.avaghon.nl/download/Naloop_Bikestability-Forkrake.pdf

(Disclaimer: this post contains loads of generlisations, tough poopoo)

you clearly don't recognise subtlety then?

no what is that?

Well reading this I've learnt that cross frames had higher bottom brackets...nice.