Victoria Pendleton

And, bizarrely, about 90% of female pro footballers are lesbians. No one has yet come up with a satisfactory theory as to why. (Though I reckon you lot will probably have a go... Hee hee.)

The obvious theories are, er, obvious. So obvious that they don't need enumerating here. A 'satisfactory' theory, on the other hand, would, by definition, have to satisfy somebody, and for every person satisfied by any one theory, there will be ten more dissatisfied by same, rendering the theory unsatisfactory. It simply isn't a phenomenon susceptible to a universal explanation