Pavement cyclists beware

I've never really had to deal with cycle plods before(except for watching a pair have their bikes nicked from right beside them by the local n.e.ds while telling off their mates) and was just wondering if anyone had committed an 'offense' of any nature and been chased by the law? Presumably their comedy mtbs wouldn't catch any but the fattest of road/fg riders? May have to get a bike up to full legal road spec - tons of reflectors etc and go pick a race. New sport? Everyone bring £30 for the fixed penalty/winnings and the first back to the pub wins the pot, busted people have to challenge the plod to a duel to the death, using bikes like pugle sticks

just a suggestion