What Biscuit?

"back in the day" Marks Und Sparks used to do what can only be described as a kind of midi-sized milk chocolate hobnob, but better.. they evoke going to my Grandma's as a kid cos she always got them in the tin for us when we came round, and in fact I only ever ate them there, so there's mitigating factors here - but they were the best damn biscuits I ever had.

Anyone know if M&S still do them?

Don't go there - it'll never be the same. You'll wander into M&S, with a feeling of abstract hopefulness. Out of the corner of your eye you see a familiar packaging - yes, yes it's them - definitely them. You smile as you hand them to the cashier - regailing her with your tale of granny-biscuits and childhood innocence. As you walk out the store, you can't help but whip one out of the bag for a cheeky munch. As you bite into it, something's not quite right. Not as sugary, not as flavoursome - simply not as nice. The disappointment takes over, your day ruined, and then you die - die in an inky black well of despair. The police break down your door a week later, to find you curled up in bed, with the biscuits by your side, a framed picture of your grandma nestled lovingly in your arms, with the watermarks of tears cried in equal measures of shame and sadness dried onto your face.

Don't go there my friend - don't go there.