Attacked

I'm not totally perceiving the attack bit here james..I was expecting golf clubs, or iron bars (see grooves, multi.) this is just regular road aggro innit?

Yeah man Festus know hows to do proper road rage, none of this I nearly had a road rage incident crap, honestly.....the kids today eh.

taxi driver who hit me, and then squared up to me, even though he drove into me and was entirely in the wrong.

I knocked over a woman in Euston Road. She was crossing at the red-man, instead of the green-man, so I was in the right of way, but she jumped backwards into my path. She cracked her head open on the asphalt, and blood started gushing out of her head. My reaction? I started screaming obscenities at the unconscious, and nearly dying woman.

I did this due to a fear reflex. I would wager, so did the taxi-driver. Not so much of an arse, but just plain frightened, and reacted with the full force of adrenalin coursing through his veins.

I once killed a fly, it felt the full force of my hungover rage.

i thought you were the prancing lancer?
you should have outdanced him.
laid down some special moves on the spot.
bamboozled him with your dashing flexibility
whilst telling him you were going to diss him through the medium of modern dance interposed with ancient swordplay moves.

that would have told the cunt.

I once killed a fly.

You're lying. From what I gather, you COULDN'T hurt a fly.

In fact, I wouldn't let you near a bouncy castle, for fear that the walls do you a mischief.

[Peeps on here are just far too nice to be killers]

You get a lot of blue collar white van Driving bell ends along that road trying to cut out the A1.
Lived there for years and had a few near misses cause the roads are tight in places but its luck of the draw really.

You are right to be annoyed but you should have been carrying one of your swords and chopped him up, cut him zorro style! "D J" across his forehead

The only advise i have is to take the passive route if the driver was in the wrong and then comes after you beeping his horn. he is clearly looking for something to kick off.

The best bet is wait till he is along side you and just stare coldly at him - get him thinking you would enjoy disfiguering him and keep doing it at every stop till he freaks out

Peeps on here are just far too nice to be killers

Yep - bunch of pussies. Spend all day hiding behind their PCs, starting arguments and posting shit they wouldn't say to your face...

Oh...

I once killed a fly, it felt the full force of my hungover rage.

Flies have feelings too!

I don't know if this is worth anything whatsoever to anyone - and of course people ride as they need to - but a bit of advice would be to stop with the directed aggression, however aggrieved you feel. A couple of weeks ago james you had a thread about calling someone a "fucking useless cunt" or something like that. Today you did the "wanker" signal at the driver. Thing is either someone is cowed by that kind of response or they think, "who's this fucking wanker" and they go ballistic, and what started as indiscriminate bad driving then becomes direct confrontation.

There are loads of people in London who haven't come down from the provinces after their degree to find their way in the world of banking or the media. A lot of Londoners aren't middle-aged Islington liberals. A lot of real original Londoners are tasty with their fists and hard as nails. Sooner or later someone will just want to kick your head in if you're on your bike roaring obscenities at them.

An incredulous and annoyed "JEEEEEEZ" with a shake of the head is very different to "You fucking WANKER!!!" and accompanying hand signals that aren't part of the cycling proficiency test.

I know you may think it's your "natural reaction" but if it really is you need to work on it if you want to avoid these situations (people getting out their cars, peds kicking off etc..- not stupid driving or walking out - you'll never get ride of those..)

course you still get the odd driver or pedestrian who are complete nutters and put you in hospital with the help of an iron bar for their own amusement but, as dogsballs has said - this is London my friend.

Word.
I packs the heat when i aint rolling Richmond braaa

woot Richmond

Eye Contact and a thinking jesture usually do the job. Failing that just kick off the cunts wingmirror and kidnap his gurlfriend through the passenger side window.

Tynan is great at the internets malarky, but clearly useless in reality.

Do you have a link or website address, sounds good, do they use flash ?

You should have lanced him. Oh yeah you weren't packin'.

.

1 Attachment

ride naked and greased up to aid escape seriously tho I had to wrestle for my bike today and is wasn't nice

what on earth is that?

That was tynan

Beans my friend, beans.

An incredulous and annoyed "JEEEEEEZ" with a shake of the head is very different to "You fucking WANKER!!!".

exactly my first thought, even if it just a 'wanker' sign, it's still add to aggression, hell the driver for all you could know may have a very short temper!

You were very fortunate to be 'attacked' in such a way ;-)

You should have cycled away from him very slowly, so he followed you far enough away from the car for it to get nicked...

that would have served him right.

I made the "wanker" gesture at the driver

this makes even mild mannered middle aged, bespectacled businessmen turn into wannabe chuck norrises

when I do that sign, I think first "am I ready for a fight with this cunt?"

if the answer is yes, then wrist the shit out of it.

if no, ride on, young man, ride on to the north, and your fortune!

I find the two finger gesture is less inflammatory. Or shouting fuck off at the top of your voice.

this makes even mild mannered middle aged, bespectacled businessmen turn into wannabe chuck norrises

Luckily I'm not mild mannered. I don't want to be Chuck Norris.

I love giving these fuckers the wanker sign. Especially effective when they have just whizzed past me too close or pulled out in front and you know they are looking in there wing mirror. Some guy in a fucking Smart car actually tried to chase me down once after a similar incident. He couldn't catch me though. Ended up with him getting out of his car screaming at me to come back. What a laugh.