The day I went too far

Me:"Please"
Tesco assistant:"What, I didn't hear what you said?"
Me: "I said 'please', as in "that's £6 please". As in 'please', 'thankyou', 'hello', don't treat me like I'm invisible".

Feeling guilty later on I started to think about the times I've been less than courteous when doing my job. Couriering is a service industry and one of the golden rules is that you can't, can't, be rude to the clients no matter how rude or unhelpful they are. And that includes clients' clients. It's not that easy at times and there have even been complaints about the look that a rider gave someone. Nowadays I usually content myself with the childish but satisfying use of my middle finger to point out where they should sign.
Then I remembered The Day I Went Too Far.
I had about 6 jobs on going east (it was a while ago if I had that many jobs on at once) and the way it worked out the first one I'd picked up was the last to be delivered; my controller hadn't said otherwise so that's just how it worked out. The last package was travel documents from one of our busiest clients to a woman at a large company on Bishopsgate. When I got there she was waiting in the huge lobby and had clearly been there a while. She was not happy.
Even before I could hand over the envelope she started, wanting, demanding to know why I was so late. I tried to explain that I wasn't late, there was no deadline and that I'd actually done the jobs quickly. But that cut no ice - it often doesn't, clients tend not to appreciate that there are other clients, other deliveries. No matter how patiently I tried to explain, and even apologise, she wouldn't calm down. I suggested that there wasn't much more I could tell her, that she was asking about stuff beyond my control. No, that wasn't good enough either. By now I had had enough of being blamed for something I hadn't done. I don't remember what it was she finally said to provoke me but I know what I replied: "I hope your plane crashes".
Riding back to the west end I was expecting the call at any moment and sure enough it came. My controller asked me to come to the office.
I was sent to see the courier manager. Obviously I knew why and was wondering how I was going to talk my way out of the sack. I decided to deny everything.
My manager at that time was an unimpressive man, he resembled a blond sparrow with watery eyes. A man who could, as the old joke has it, brighten a room just by leaving it. His interrogation skills weren't exactly top notch. He asked what had happened at Bishopsgate; there had been a complaint. I said, not much, the woman was annoyed because she thought I was late. He asked me what I had said. Not much, I replied, tried to explain but she wouldn't listen. All the time looking in to his piss weak eyes and waiting for him to say it. Which he did. He quoted what I had said.
Deny deny deny. A look of outrage and shock passed across my face; how could she? I never said any such thing, why would I? I may have said something about her catching her plane but... I think I even said that *ofcourse *if any courier said such a terrible thing they would deserve the sack we all know we have to bite our tongues at times.
He asked me again. I denied it again and I realised I was safe. He knew I was lying, I knew he knew and I knew he wasn't going to sack me. Maybe because it was a client's client and not a client. Maybe because I'd worked there so long. Perhaps he just didn't have the bottle. I was relieved too because now atleast I wouldn't have to try crying as a last ditch way to get him to give me another chance.
That manager is long gone and I'm still there. I think one year I had three final warnings. But I haven't, since, wished death on any client so I guess I learned my lesson.

so what's the moral here.

A few weeks back a woman (who from the look of her house was clearly incredibly rich) refused to pay me for a cash job I'd delivered to her because the smallest amount of money she had was a tenner and I had no change. The job cost £6. She was incredibly rude to me but rather than wish death on her, I just took the package back and left, feeling very upset.

I am a weak man.

Will, I know how it feels. I have no tolerance to rudeness. None at all.
I have always been pretty volatile, jumping into things with two feet - or more often with my fists.
Because of this, I recognise the importance of being polite, courteous and respectful to all, and that's the trigger with me... lack of respect.
If you've broken your back to provide a service for someone, and they diss you... bring on the whirlwind of rage.

Good for you. The thing that upset me most when I was a courier were the people who believed they are better than you be virtue of their job and used to be regularly rude. Used to really upset me. I surprisingly never rose to any bait though. I just used to use the stock line 'If you are unhappy with the service please get in touch with the office' Just kept saying that every single time. They eventually got bored

imagine if that woman's plane had actually crashed, and her last memory was of you!

I only had a problem with one person while working downtown. I had to deliver to a building with the worst receptionist I've ever encountered. I too have been a receptionist and have never treated anyone the way this girl would treat me. Everytime I came in, she would roll her eyes, and huff n puff when she had to sign papers. I never gave her any reason to be that way, but she was. What struck me as odd also, was that she had framed pictures of just herself on her desk. Strange.

Cf: Spike Milligan's 'Adolf Hitler - My Part In His Downfall'. He cursed a Spitfire that buzzed him and then saw it crash.

Moral:
Keep enough time free in the evening to sabotage her plane.
Take a video camera to airport.
Youtube fame.

so what's the moral here.

My guess is that it's more of an allegory than a morality tale...

'no tolerance to rudeness'

Try living in Paris for 9months - Christ, I dunno how I never whacked anyone!?

I only had a problem with one person while working downtown. I had to deliver to a building with the worst receptionist I've ever encountered. I too have been a receptionist and have never treated anyone the way this girl would treat me. Everytime I came in, she would roll her eyes, and huff n puff when she had to sign papers. I never gave her any reason to be that way, but she was. What struck me as odd also, was that she had framed pictures of just herself on her desk. Strange.

!?!

^^Mhm. It was really weird. I think she had like one big framed one and then a little collage....but framed.

Pisti - I can only imagine.... ha ha

What struck me as odd also, was that she had framed pictures of just herself on her desk. Strange.

Twins are closer than regular siblings...

so what's the moral here.

This is dirty realism, not Aesop.

Well hopefully her twin is nicer.

clients tend not to appreciate that there are other clients,

Oh how similar our jobs are.

so what's the moral here.

Don't shop at Tescos.

i thought this was going to be a story about delivering a package to epsom or chingford and not being able to find your way back.

i thought this was going to be a story about delivering a package to epsom or chingford and not being able to find your way back.

Not

When I was a receptionist in EC1 the couriers where a highlight of my day. There always seemed to be an element of fun to them, even on the busiest and wettest days. Had I been into cycling then, I probably would have joined the ranks.

When it comes to situations like Will's, it rarely pays to try and reason with the customer for more than a moment or two. Instead of trying to set them straight on how the world doesn't revolve around them, start agreeing with them (if you can be bothered to be polite and not just walk out the door). If they get angry that something is late, you get angry that someone else's incompetence has made you miss an important professional deadline. The vast majority of people won't clock the u-turn and will just go with the transference of blame (preferably to someone irrelevant, untraceable or most preferably fictional). Never ever apologise, especially not for your own actions, the person you're dealing with may get the impression that you're not the best employee a company could ever wish for and that simply won't do.

Following on from the 'pictures of herself on the desk' thing, a friend of mine used to work in the offices of a vast chemical works. There had been some charity event, and he had been asked to go to a part of the building he had never been to before, to collect some money from a manager there. He eventually found this office, and asked this managers secretary if she would collect the money from her boss. He had never seen her before. She knocked on her bosses door and went in, and while he waited, my friend looked at the stuff on her desk. There, in pride of place, was a large framed picture of himself! The secretary returned, but he was too freaked out to ask her why she had a picture of him. He just sort of stumbled to the door.
He never did find out.

husband and wife team?

Hang on a minute.... She had your friends picture on her desk???