Irrefutable scientific proof that cycling drunk is safer than cycling sober

Sorry to sound dull, but in a world where we as cyclists spend alot of time whining about car drivers should we not be trying to keep clear of any areas which could result in bad press for cyclists?

Doesn't sound dull to me, if you're always in the right, then it's not your fault if you get hit. If you're in the wrong and so is the other guy it'll make it a lot harder to prove it was their fault.

Actually that does sound dull, but I've been hit before, its not something I'd care to repeat.