Irrefutable scientific proof that cycling drunk is safer than cycling sober

...if we're going to compare the number of accidents when drunk to the number of accidents when sober the main difference has to be the fact that most people will spend a vastly smaller amount of time riding drunk than they do riding sober.

Do u think that's because theres less traffic by the time your drunk?

...it's generally late at night and there's less traffic which makes it less of a deathtrap.

Yes, yes, and yes. But come on, let's not let sense get in the way of pseudoscience. I'm trying to convince the media to report that drunken cycling is safer so we can all have a laugh about how stupid, gullible and lacking in scientific knowlege some journalists and editors are.

...getting hit by a car when its not your fault sucks, but at least you can claim some money from their insurance. If you're drunk you'll have a pretty hard time getting anything ... unless you're really good at acting sober ;)

Good point.