Random acts of bicycle maintenance

I really want a non fixed wheel familiar theif to try and steal my bike from me conviniently at the top of a gnarly hill.
Ofcourse my bike will be brakeless. is it possible to learn to skid stop in a matter of seconds?

he'd have to try and get on the bike in the first place when he realise he can't turn the pedal back let alone starting off is quite different with a fixed wheel.

Well most of the time I'm a little less hardcore. If I see a chump has left his light on ill switch it off. Or even guys who leave their lights on their bikes lying in the streets ill stick a note on saying its probably not a good idea. As Coppi says, its all about the note.

I do that a lots actually, turning off the light I mean.