Simplicity is the Key to Successful Living...

that doesn't work. people will tear you to pieces for not posting any shit. I'm not even trying to make a clever joke, it's just the way it is. someone somewhere will find someone else's non-offensiveness deeply contemptible and irritating.

It's a shit life.

That's bollocks. It's a wonderful life. Especially when you don't cough up 'black shit' (shudder) on a daily basis.