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@tom.
Go and work for Peaches Geldof's magazine, then kill her. I'm sure that at least 5% of the population will give you a quid, so you could potentially earn £300,000+ in a month. If Bob then died of grief or something, I'm sure that would be worth another few quid each.
Any chance of getting a jump on the queue for this super sale? I'm kinda busy and I'd be gutted if I missed my opportunity.