I confess...

I still ride everywhere like a kid racing a bmx
Thats me all over 'big kid on big bmx'

Also, when I was working at a bank in the States, I thought it would be cool to help out people who couldn't afford to buy a house by giving them special mortgages? And then it turned it to be really popular, so I gave out loads of them, so many that I had to parcel the debt up and sell it off to banks all around the world. But then all those people I was trying to help didn't pay their instalments, and the banks couldn't get their money back, so they all stopped lending to each other, and it all just got really out of hand, and I'd just like to say I'm really sorry about the whole thing.

I only like radials laced 'out'.

i bought my bike at BLB

when I was about 7, my mate and I started a fire in a field in the corner of a playground. It got out of control and we panicked.
When the adults came we told them we'd seen bigger boys start the fire and run away and we were trying to put it out (with our water pistols).
We were then hailed as heroes.

Also, when I was working at a bank in the States, I thought it would be cool to help out people who couldn't afford to buy a house by giving them special mortgages? And then it turned it to be really popular, so I gave out loads of them, so many that I had to parcel the debt up and sell it off to banks all around the world. But then all those people I was trying to help didn't pay their instalments, and the banks couldn't get their money back, so they all stopped lending to each other, and it all just got really out of hand, and I'd just like to say I'm really sorry about the whole thing.

I'd rep you for that.. but now I know you own a Bentley. :P

i bought my bike at BLB

We have a winner!

when I was about 7, my mate and I started a fire in a field in the corner of a playground. It got out of control and we panicked.
When the adults came we told them we'd seen bigger boys start the fire and run away and we were trying to put it out (with our water pistols).
We were then hailed as heroes.

My brother was busted lighting the carpet on fire.
I was busted making molitov cocktails.
My brothers and I once started a bush fire that drew the fire bridgade and police.
I won a pyromaniac award on a school camp. (they award this shit.. no wonder I was fucked up with fire!)

when I was about 7, my mate and I started a fire in a field in the corner of a playground. It got out of control and we panicked.
When the adults came we told them we'd seen bigger boys start the fire and run away and we were trying to put it out (with our water pistols).
We were then hailed as heroes.

A friend of mine did something similar back home but in a wooded area. It got out of control and took out about half an acre. We were looking at a satellite photo of the area a couple of years ago and the effects were still visible after about 20 years.

no vinegar, instead…

Hippys Lippy Chippy - "We piss on your chips"

back home it was all about 3 chips swimming in a lovely bowl of gravy. wiganwill knows what i'm talking about.

I ride a geared bike. I also try to stop it with my legs.

I ride a bike without a seat. SS though, which is my only saving grace.

back home it was all about 3 chips swimming in a lovely bowl of gravy. wiganwill knows what i'm talking about.

There was one chip shop in Mildura that did the best, fucking BEST chips and gravy.
Their chips were like no other.. fucking awesome. The last time I was there, they'd been modernised and I don't think they were as good but even that was a long time ago now.
Damn.. I want those chips!!

1. I was caught shoplifting aged 10
   
2. I ate a litre jar of pickled onions at my brothers 7th birthday when I was 5, puked said onions up all over the place, and have't had one in 20 years
   
3. I just received the Twister boardgame that I got off eBay for £3 and I'm as happy as a pig in shit
   
4. It took me 8 years to go down a handrail on my bmx and when I did I sold it and quit as my trick list was complete
   

I'm considering joining the arrospok waiting list.

I can't understand a word Joey Ramone sings... but i like the Ramones

There was one chip shop in Mildura that did the best, fucking BEST chips and gravy.

Thought this was going to be a limerick...

There's a vague possibility that I might have Scarlet Fever. But its got me out of visiting babies this weekend.

There's a vague possibility that I might have Scarlet Fever. But its got me out of visiting babies this weekend.

I have accidently shot my wad in my mouth.

I have accidently shot my wad in my mouth.

that beats tommy's pig jizz incident 4 sure! ewww.

I'm prone to toppling while stationary, yet am too lazy to swap out my egg beaters when my 2 year olds in the child seat.
Hes used to it, but I dont alf get some cold looks from onlookers

......Even worse than scarring and potientaly maiming small children.........I ride a hybrid, complete with joke suspension fork (i'm building my fixed, honest)

i ate an entire bowl of horseradish and set fire to my nipples at a young farmers stipper party for £7

lot a money at the time

Stipper party?
That's a new one on me - kindly elucidate young man...

when a party got out of hand, i once "accidently" caused about £5k worth of criminal damage. a copper lodged at the property at the time. i ran and ran and ran and ran. and then conscience got the better of me and i fessed up the next morning. the girl whos party it was was hot. her mum was hotter.

I once ate a pound of cooked cabbage and did a 23 second fart (second best was 15)