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@dooks
the sandwich delivery man in my office has a little bell to announce his arrival. except he obviously doesn't understand the concept of sound (as in that it travels though the air at severqal hundred mph and is omnidirectional and capable of reflecting round corners etc) because instead of just ringing his little bell once vaguely in the direction of the office (which would easily sufice), he walks a comprehensive and puposeful circuit of the entire place passing every single desk, ringing as he goes with a weird blank look on his face. he does this every single day. i'm thinking of bringing in a big "lunchbell" style clanger and following him about, crashing and clanging away shouting "HOW YOU LIKE THEM BELLS!" ding ding.