• Me: "Can you read?"
    Motorcyclist: "What?!"
    Me: "Can you read?"
    Motorcyclist: "Yeah!" (bewildered)
    Me: "Then go read Highway Code 178 you [insult du jour] and stay the fuck out of the cycle lanes!"

    My reply would have been 'Can you duck?' before punching you off your spack chariot ;)

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