This Is England...

You must have a little tinge of happiness at the thought of a grifter?
What about the 3 speed sturmey archer gears with colour coded shifter and a neutral gear?
... or the moulded padding on the handlebars?
...or the hexagon pattern on the tyres?
...or the seat that disintegrated and left a flat mild steel plate for you to sit on,
...or the ratly round reflector underneath the seat?
---or, even if its just the smugness of not having to ride a bike when you're 10 that weighs half a ton.

but they did weigh a ton!

before that I had a very old fixed thing with rod-pull brakes.

the problem was, by the time my parents could afford to get me the grifter, I had it only five minutes before the raleigh burner came out!

grifters were the must-have of the previous year, but the burner was nigh-on a proper BMX!

I had to ride the grifter for many years, the gears had stopped working, the seat was as you describe and the handlebar padding was partially worn, that stuff was tough.