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@31trum
having not had any sex with my girlfriend for a while , i get a phone call that makes me want to go home early, unfortunately i work 9-5, so at 5 i tore home( from hayes in middlesex to the elephant) in a hour flat, noticed her car was not there, jumped in the shower, put on best pants( the only ones without holes) and laid on the couch in a provocative manner, only to notice a little note saying "sorry had to go to mum's"
well went to the fridge got a few beers waited for the adult channel to start ( sky is in her name ) and proceeded to wank myself silly for a few hours............erm, does that count??
bike and porn are both mentioned!