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There was another dairy allergy death in recent times. A woman died from eating a wrap from Pret, it was meant to be vegan but the coconut yoghurt in it had been contaminated at the manufacturer which is something Pret can't control. I had a reaction to an M&S salad with coconut yoghurt in, that I've eaten loads of times, around the same time as the Pret death and assumed it was the same manufacturer.
I can see it being very easy to mix up orders, and put different names on coffee cups, it looks manic at busy times.
Also plenty of people drink alternative milks due to preference or beliefs rather than allergy/intolerance, so a small amount of cross contamination is probably rarely noticed.
It’s the first time I’ve heard of someone having a deadly allergy to milk/lactose though.
There’s probably trace amounts of lactose in any restaurant food that’s not vegan.