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  • We have a woman on our plot that turns up once a year, clears her plot then fucks off. This year she hasn't even done that and her plot is smothered in bindweed. It's going to be a mare to sort but I've told the committee I'll take it on if they can get her to fuck off. It's a double plot and I only have a half, they've said the next double that comes up is mine anyway. In other news, harvesting courgettes, chillies and a forest of callaloo.


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  • My opposite neighbour does the same thing. Absolutely boils my piss. I shop him at least 3-4x per year but they never kick him off. It’s well rubbish.

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