This morning's commute and other commuting stories

I want to tell you about my commute home this afternoon.
Get a coffee, a tea and maybe a biscuit too.
Before I left work today I snapped the catch on my backpack and repaired it with a few reusable cable ties , this may or may not be important later.
Anyway I left work and as it’s Friday I do what I usually do and go for a bit of a detour home. I was aiming for the usual 50km ish ride. So I head off into the countryside to blow away the cobwebs, I settle into a nice fast pace at round the 30kph mark. I get out into nowhere land and in the distance I see another cyclist in full kit and I’m slowly catching them and I mean slowly. Normally I would slowly catch them up and say hello, have a little chat and slowly pull away. But. I saw that this was a female rider, again we are in the arsehole end nowhere, I use the loan female rider protocol that Liz (Wife) had discussed before. I hang back, however the rider has slowed down a bit now and I’m having to ride too slowly to stay back. I use protocol 2 which is hang back a bit more and then build a bit of speed to pass them and make it stick. I pass them wide, on the other side of the white line, as I pass I say HI and I get the reply of COCK! I carry on and once there is a clear space between us I slow back down to 30kmh ish. At which point the rider blasts past me shouting FUCKING PRICK wtf? They then slow down once in front, but this time to around 15kph FFS! I slow down too, but I’m feeling a lot weird now. Luckily there’s a left turn and they ride past it, so I turned down it and headed for home. I cut my ride short and now I feel bad. I don’t know what I should have done, obviously I came across as a testosterone fuelled twat and not someone trying to not make someone else feel uncomfortable.
I know you can’t please everyone all the time, but I’m sure they are posting about some macho twat that couldn’t cope seeing a girl on a bike