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The irony is not lost on me, however everytime I have to use a cafetiere, the wash up is the faff I do not need in my life. Also, if you don't stir after some steeping, the crust messes up the plunge...so I'm partially with the op on 'cafetiere = faff'. I will die on the hill of aeropress is least faff.
I’m a scales and timer and in-line water filter guy, but the OP said he found cafetière a faff. I reckon the last few pages of suggestions are enough to put him back onto instant.
I believe cafetière is the closest you can get to chucking coffee and water together and getting an ok coffee.