Overheard at the LFGSS golf club bar

the weekly sourdough pickup

you can't get a sofa worth sitting on now for less than £1k,

Poss reep

Not gonna click on the Graun

Hell no! Goddam Trots!

We had a cheese subscription

Finally made it into the club!

Imagine I'll be booted out by the club captain once he finds out the reason for my anti-Graun stance, mind.

2 dishwashers. One for cleaned dry stuff, the other for dirty pots. Switch on rotation.

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just buying another house

My Dad has a pool

Should be Daddy really

or Pater

Only amongst family and friends. "My father" when referring to the old fella in public.

Bit Freudian calling your penis that.

No - you are only really posh if you refer to your parents as mummy and daddy throughout your adult life. My father is for plebs

My father is for plebs

Doesn’t make him very golf club

Mater and Pater?

You see this is where I draw the distinction

Golf clubs aren’t for posh people
Huntin shootin fishin is for posh people, golf clubs are for people with money and aspirations.

Huntin shootin fishin

Perhaps it depends on the target? Paying 5 figures to shoot water buffalo on a private estate > posh > potshooting vermin on the struggling family farm in northern England.

golf clubs are for people with money and aspirations.

5 more year of torys please

the Comic Strip crew and Monty Python crew were some of the last bastions of decent Britsh comedy.

They are ten a penny here in France. They are the ones with British passports.

Wrong. I grew up on a diet of pheasant/venison/rabbit and when lucky enough to catch them Dover sole and cod.
Growing up on a council estate things like beef were rarely eaten due to the cost but with the countryside on the doorstep and a firearms licence food was cheaper sourced there than the supermarket.
We used to go cockling (not sure if that’s a word but raking cockles at low tide)and my folks would give them away at the pub and not have to buy a drink.
Golf is a wankers pastime only horse racing has a higher cunty factor.

I grew up on a diet of pheasant/venison/rabbit

with the countryside on the doorstep and a firearms licence