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I drank all the mercury, which explains a lot.
This is precisely the sort of job that allows landscapers to decide whether to work for a client.
Me: if you want that lot out, it will probably take two blokes a day and cost 'x'.
Client: that's too much.
Me: let me know when you've dug it out and we'll do the rest of the job.
Fill the hole with mercury and float the sucker out, surely?