Bike Anti-Porn - When Things Go Wrong

Wibble, wobble, wibble, wobble, jelly on a plate!

Go home bike, you're drunk

Fucking hell, I thought this was Photoshop liquify tool memery. Literally hurts my brain to look at.

I think the Tango came out before the Dogmas with the curvy stays and forks.

See Colnago C35, or don't if you have any respect for your retinas.

I know we’ve had this a couple of pages ago but it’s DJ Spoony’s bike (just look at those bars) and also comes with a Spotify playlist….

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Spotted this in the wild

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There was an article in Rouleur this month on Dj Spoony and this bike. Funnily enough it was "produced" in association with Ribble. To be fair the article wasn't all that bad.

Friend of mine lives near Bedford and cycles, still hasn't bumped into Spoony but was pretty hyped when he saw this post during lockdown. Much better setup, even with mismatched tyres

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+1
It's one of them anti-aesthetic aesthetics, whatchamacallit

Namedropping

Pininfarina and Obree, in the same sentence, let alone paragraph?

Dude be trippin.

Full points for being outside of the box, though

Just needs those drops switching out for some risers

Naw, just turn them upside down for a proper canadian beer caddy.

Perfect size for a 2 4 eh?

As long as they’re stubbies, the long neck americanos stick out too far and can bounce out, of course breaking far more easily than the superior short bottles.

When S-works goes wrong.
For sale, too

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I wouldn’t even try and sell that unless I had found a NOS seatpost.

picture association game

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When I was working for a total fraud douchebag, a woman came into the shop with an ISP Look that was too big for her, which she'd picked up for a great price...

I wanted to tell her to flip it for more dough and buy herself a bike which fit, but instead Douchey McDoucheface made me wreck it for her.

This fuckwit had me building $15k bikes for 23 bucks an hour, and told me off a couple of times for telling customers I could build stronger wheels for them with double-butted spokes... Turns out he was telling them to go with plain 14g because he insisted that butted spokes would fail, because he was an ignorant dumb fuck and a total fraud. Fuck you, Anthony!

Wow. Sounds like a d-bag. Where was the shop?

Fortunately the seller is offering a new one with the bike.

That’ll teach me for not opening the link!

With the weird caveat that only if you message them specifically asking for it…

Was probably a good shop when his old man ran it... Bloke was an actual mechanic, I gather... There was a bunch of fairly nice steel frames made back in the day with the name too.

But his dad has been out of the picture for ages. It was the mid 90s when my uncle took his frame in with a fork and headset, and this cockspank was running the joint. Cut his steerer on an angle, too short, and then faced the bottom of his head tube without asking so the locknut could only just bite a single thread.

You come across a lot of people in the industry who are snobby wankers, who act like knowing a thing or two about bikes makes you worth more than other people... This cunt acted like that while only pretending to know the things. I bet he treated all his mechanics like total shit (while shmoozing it up with the sales guys), except maybe the worst ones who couldn't tell him anything. Wonder what the average turnover's been over the years... I lasted 14 months before I ragequit over the continuous disrespect.

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