• I was a waiter at the 40th birthday party for the producer of that show. And or Dec, no idea which is which, fell asleep in the sun during the day and had a beetroot face and was semi delusional, Judy from Richard & Judy was so shitfaced she opened the cage lift about two feet too early and fell face first into the foyer (Andy Peters helped me get her into a chair), Philip Schofield arrived in a helicopter too pissed to speak and in the morning I saw Cat Deeley stark naked when the birthday boy (her boyfriend) let me into their room without her knowing to deliver a tray of breakfast, and gave me £50 for the privilege

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