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amey
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@Maj
Went for a little ride down the Hackney canal with a friend for coffee, it’s funny as they have essentially my bike but from another generation
When we pulled up to the boat house cafe I not only had a great can of Fanta, but were treated to a show.
Enter stage right, arcteryx dad, almond mum and 2 kids.
The dad, exasperated “i didn’t know it had sugar in ok?!”
The mum, in a questioning tone, “you didn’t know iced tea had sugar in? And the cinnamon bun?”
The dad tries to retort “you wanted a donut!!!”
The astute mother, clearly used to this level of debate points out “this is not a donut? This is a cinnamon bun, they’re different, can you change it”
The tone changes here, the dad, on his last legs emotionally lets out “I can’t change it, I don’t want to, I already had to go back in and cancel the bacon sandwhich”
At this point, one of the children between the two asks “daddy, why couldn’t we get the bacon sandwhich?” I felt sorry for this child, I knew what the reason would be, the mother did too and looked to the father to explain, it was his mistake after all.
“Because the bacon has nitrates in, and nitrates give you cancer so we can’t have it”
I stifled a laugh at this point, the vision of an almond mother agreeing with the comment, I can only assume while the white woman TikTok radicalisation she received releases morally just endorphins into her brain, be it that or the emotional cuckholdery of her husband was too much of a vision on this brisk Hackney canal.
Me and my friend simply looked at one another, both in stasis as we saw this parody play out, al I could do was continue eating my orange at this point.
Soon after, while we held our breaths, almost like nature documentarians not wanting to interfere with the Mother Nature, the couple left and we could breathe, laugh and gossip about it.
Unbeknownst to me, while I was buying my Fanta and my orange, my friend told me that the guy tried to ask about the bike, so I type this with the risk that he’s “on here” if you are, I understand if you want to be anonymous. It’s ok.
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