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@Gewürzt
So, to answer my question as I've finally done this. In the end I got a revolut ultra plan in order to transfer the cash without any fees. It's 45 quid a month but I downgraded back to standard within 14 days and got that refunded immediately.
Getimg the money from my bank to revolut took a few days because of the daily transfer limit for HSBC, if you're in the UK you can transfer without limit but you have to be in branch. I'm not in the UK so didn't have that option. Revolut doesn't have any limits on transfers so when I transfered from Revolut to my French bank I could just do it all in one go. Revolut sent it out immediately but it took a day for my French bank to clear it.
I checked loads of places but revolut just had a better exchange rate than anywhere and by quite a bit too. If anyone does do this though make sure you buy your euros first using revolut's exchange then make the transfer. If you just make the bank transfer in pounds and let revolut do the exchange at that point you'll get a slightly worse rate. On their site they say the exchange rate is the same no matter how you do it but that's not the case, when I queried this with them they said they use the mid rate for bank transfers and the high rate for when you buy currency. It's not an insignificant difference. For me I was about 500 euros better off by not just making a straight transfer.
Fuck me that was a long post, I know it's a bit niche and golf club but it's bloody stressful trying to transfer you whole life's savings to another country so hopefully this can help someone.