How do I bathroom / kitchen / extension? etc.

I wonder if you could get away with some carefully selected plants + camo wrap?

A bit like:

I've always been suprised at how effective this is irl to make bins less jarring.

This is cool though - would do

Sadly this one seems to be Linkedin vapourware :(

Some seen in the wild in the Netherlands
https://twitter.com/Chris_Carus/status/1689756927461355520?t=ex4J23eq-Oc6rJp-RjXXfQ&s=19

looks fun in pics but doubt they are a working thing. We got white ‘neve’ tiles 97mm x 97mm from this place. Affordable (about £35 /sqm) but when you tile a lot with smaller tiles, the money is in the labour not the tiles. http://www.towerceramics.com/Products/Zgu/White%20Tiles%20Brochure.pdf

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I went to Topps Tiles the other week and they had some white bullnose tiles that looked pretty good. Obviously the curve isn't as extreme but it might still give a nice edge:

https://www.toppstiles.co.uk/quarry/quarry-bullnose-white-tile?gclid=CjwKCAjw38SoBhB6EiwA8EQVLpg0Xi6rKZNMq99YOAZAAX1Et7LZaDGrR0NmefZPUKvN8mGF4TGdUBoC728QAvD_BwE&gclsrc=aw.ds

Nice but put the lid down 🫣

Servicing them is gonna be expensive enough never mind if its up on the roof.

Famously, loft ladders are cripplingly expensive!

It feels like this is just a relatively straightforward design problem to be honest. And, really, this might help with the many old terraced houses we have here.

As ever, we seem to be behind on this stuff by at least a decade…

I actually found the Alibaba version with a reverse image search. https://x.alibaba.com/AutIZ4

You can hire them from Jewson too if that doesn't work out, not unreasonably priced and you get to take sweet selfies.

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Lol

I know they can't be boxed in completely, but there must be a way to do better....

This could help with the noise too. The recent funding upgrade and new tech like Cosy Octopus will hopefully make one viable for us, but I'm noise sensitive, so a bit worried about whether I could actually live with one.

The logical extension of this for a victorian terrace would be demolishing the chimney stack, brick vinyl wrap or even better brick slips, then fake chimney pots on top with your aerials in.

Prefab or dummy chimneys made from GRP are already a thing and sometimes they're used to enclose mobile phone masts. I've seen pictures of this but can't find one now.

Heat pump equivalent of astroturf

I’d check with your tiler - from what I’ve heard dtile are a bit of a nightmare (well it could just be lazy/slack UK tilers) I remember specifically seeing proctor&shaw or someone post about it

Famously, loft ladders are cripplingly expensive!

It's more the additional labour costs of folks comfortable working at height, additional time taken to do the job at height and the associated H&S tax.

Most folks are happy just have a working heat producing device, let alone be picky about where it's positioned. 99% of us are gonna get these things slapped in our back yards, in the same way our boilers are slapped against the most convenient externally facing wall so we can run a flue pipe into our neighbours faces.

These things would obviously have access from inside the house, so no working at height required after the install.

There are many people that appear to be concerned about the location, size, and noise of these things, and a little ingenuity could well help with uptake. It’s hardly beyond the wit of humankind to consider some alternative to slapping it in the back garden.

I mean, many new builds have fake chimney pots for no reason other than vibes, may as well do something useful and aesthetically considered?

Wife's boss has dtile and I think she said there is some wonkiness going on.
Imagine it's be a bit hard to do.

99% of us are gonna get these things slapped in our back yards, in the same way our boilers are slapped against the most convenient externally facing wall

A bit tricky for flats with no back yards though.

Chris Stevens on the Holloway Road.

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I think your thinking that it is obvious that there would be access inside the loft, Id say it would need to be stripped externally if its similar to other units for servicing.

Most things these days aren't really designed for servicing, maintenance or cleaning, so you're definitely right if they're built similarly to other units. That doesn't really need to be the case though?

It's basically just a fridge run in reverse, with a larger fan, connected to some pipes. I don't get why they're so expensive and inflexible as a piece of technology. We should be able to put them pretty much anywhere, even internally when connected up to an insulated vent/air inlet.

These things would obviously have access from inside the house, so no working at height required after the install.

I wouldn't say that's obvious. I think it's harder to provide the access you are suggesting than you would imagine.

I don't get why they're so expensive and inflexible as a piece of technology

Have you seen the price of bikes lately?! We are just poor now :(