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Where it does excel is [...] having a big thick down tube you can put big stickers on."
That's a solid pro in my eyes! I mean as a kid I used to own a little book to collect and showcase all my cool stickers. I feel like at my age that's not socially accepted anymore. Now I need to buy bike after bike to collect my stickers.
Oddo-
Do you ever think about how in 40 years all the retirement homes are going to be stickered up to fuck by old geezers (us) who didn't use them in our prime? Will be lecturing some poor kid to "stick em when you have em sonny" even though they'll probably only understand "Stickers" as "DLC Holo Cosmetics"
Belagerent
GCN presenter effortlessly climbing an insanely steep hill whilst talking:
"Now the specs for this bike are impressive, on paper that is, but can it give some of the more boutique brands a run for their money? After all it has a nimble frame, hydraulic disc brakes and even a wide range cassette, for something that costs 460 pounds it rides a lot more like a bike that costs much more, maybe 520 pounds. So should you buy it instead of a Neutrino?"
Cut to side on camera car footage as he stands up to "give it some welly" but he immediately loses balance and falls into a hedge. Emergency services are called and he continues the monologue from the stretcher.
"And the answer is no, you shouldn't, and here's why: it's a Halfords bike that was delivered to me with a headset done up so tight I couldn't turn the front wheel. It literally does not compete on any level except price. Where it does excel is being stored under the stairs and having a big thick down tube you can put big stickers on."