Isen workshop: adventures in batch production (or not...)

I wish.

FYI:
1) Frame arrives: BB shell has two LH (or RH, I don't remember) threads. Supplier fault, but clearly Isen's rigorous QC (upon which they will repeatedly rely on as proof that the faults described can't possibly be down to them) doesn't include "frame accepts BB: Y/N". Frame returned.

2) Substitute frame arrives: it has been bubblewrapped while the paint is wet. Matt tells me that "Caren is anal about paint." and all will be good next time around. Frame returned.

3) Frame arrives: the paint is far from anal in half a dozen places, most notably a 30/40mm scratch on the underside of the BB shell, which is through to the metal and under the lacquer. Customer speaks to Caren and is told that's perfectly normal (ie "nah luv it's supposed to be like that"). Frame returned.

4) Frame arrives: the paint isn't shit. I screw-in (by hand) the DS BB cup, which is received at an angle. After confirming that I'm sober, I try again: same result. Inspection of the shell reveals that there are not one, but two threads. I speak to Caren, who tells me that I am at fault and must have chased the second thread into the shell... because QC.

Bearing in mind 1) above, clearly the substitute frame also received a faulty BB shell. And clearly it also somehow slipped through their infallible QC ("frame accepts BB: Y/N/looks alright to me").

By now Matt is bleating about how much it's costing them to ship the frame back and forth, so my LBS chased (with some difficulty) a correct thread.

5) I attempt to fit the rear wheel. Never mind fitting a disc-braked freewheel, I couldn't get a track wheel in there. Obviously with such rigorous QC in place it was nothing to do with poor work-holding or ignorance of welding distortion: the only rational explanation Matt could offer was that the stays had been crushed together in transit.

I never received a damaged box and always returned/received it with a spacer and surely if Isen had received a damaged box, they'd have checked the frame over? Curiously, aside from the undamaged box, neither the frame spacer, nor the paint, nor any part of the frameset (carbon forks included) was damaged...

I watched the manager of the LBS reset the stays: he used a piece of 4x2 that was something like three meters long to lever them apart and had to go well beyond the width of a pair of handlebars, on account of how far the stays would spring back. For them to close-up, one stay would need to physically pass through the other; either that or they'd both have to be skewed to one side or the other.

6) The frame only accepts 20/30mm of seat post. Welding the seat stays distorted the seat-tube: it was still round, but there were "blisters" in the tube where the stays attached.

I speak to Matt, who by now can't be bothered to keep up the pretence and simply limply tells me to get it reamed: "frame accepts seat post: Y/N/trust me bro".

7) Unsurprisingly Isen's customer has had enough and wants her money back: she's bought groupset, wheelset & finishing kit and we're well into Summer. Matt says there is no money (ie tough shit).

Indeed there was so little money, that Isen only manage to continue trading for... I'm sorry, how many years? How many fucking YEARS?

In order to remedy the situation though, he did have the gall to send a load of Isen tat (t-shirts, badges etc): "Frame's shit, you're shit out of luck, but here's some promotional shit."

8) If you look back through this thread, you'll find that I didn't call them out in public, but tried to resolve everything privately. What you will find though, is Matt taking deposits (and expensive parts) for frames he never delivered and Caren selling-off business assets six weeks before declaring insolvency.

TL/DR
Fuck you, you polydactyly Norfolk cunt: fuck you in the ear; fuck you in the eye and fuck the donkey you rode in on.