The fall of the Tory party

the wait for the tory party to fall is so stressful and yet boring at the same time i need something. i was on tenterhooks last november now i’m benumbed

Had a dose years ago, spent the afternoon and evening sprawled on the sofa blissed out beyond belief.

Made me vomit for two days. Felt nice in between though, at least at the start.

First time I dislocated my shoulder I went to Briancon hospital and got gas & air / Entonox. Shoulder hurt like a fucker and to be honest the drugs didn't do much. Took a doctor AND a burly porter to relocate

Second time, I ended up in Manchester Royal Infirmary in a consultation room with a half-eaten sandwich on a shelf. Junior Doctor who looked about 12 offered me morphine. As he was injecting what looked like a largish syringe he asked me "Is that enough?" .WHAT THE FUCK thinks I ... I said "I don't know, you're the doctor" at which point he left and got someone who knew what they were doing.... didn't hurt very much though

female doctor

You can just say doctor.

noted, edited. apologies

have you guys ever had morphine?

It's hard enough to get proper codeine, as opposed to those crappy substitutes that make you constipated and bloated and don't do much to actually relieve pain. Back when I was knocked off my bike by an Ocado delivery van, the hospital gave me a huge box of proper codeine. Only needed a few pills to get through the week, but that box was my most treasured possession for the next year or so.

Back to the fall of the Tory party. BBCQT tonight.

Pfft, have you guys ever had morphine?! I can see why people like heroin so much

This is the correct answer.

I was discharged from hospital with a bottle of oral morphine, I still have half of it stashed for a rainy day!

Straight up 👏👏👏

I still have half of it stashed for a rainy day!

Preppers of lfgss

Gas and air is shit, it made me want to vomit when I had my finger relocated, in the end the nurse "went in dry"

Morphine scares the fuck out of me, my son had it as a baby and became addicted to it after 3 days, three fucking days!
It took the hospital over 3 weeks to wean him off it.

Talk of morphine triggers me. I had major surgery on my knee and they put me on a morphine drip with a button to press. Only they didn't tell me I had to press a button and dropped it under the bed. So the button wasn't being pressed and I was getting nothing.

Took them three days to realise that I was 'recovering' from major surgery with no pain relief at all, by which stage they couldn't get the pain back under control, no matter how often I pressed the button. Worst week ever.

You missed out badly, I had morphine on demand on the button (unplanned dismount, 6 ribs through right lung, broken shoulderblade). It's lovely stuff, I tended to store it up then multiple button press at the first sign of a boring visitor, instantly boredom banished! After 4 days it was purely recreational, after 5 I asked for it to be removed as I was liking it too much.

Is this the FOTTP thread?
Just checking, as it looks like they’re getting close the edge

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Good "done a poo" pose, but no pointing, lanyards or high viz. 3/10.

“When you are a backbencher, you don’t even have a driver.”

Glad to see the Tories grappling with the issues that impact ordinary voters.

“When you are a backbencher, you don’t even have a driver.”

Glad to see the Tories grappling with the issues that impact ordinary voters.

They're pathetic.

Wasn't it Letwin who claimed expenses for cleaning a moat?

A memorial service for the shitty state of our roads?

"It's a pothole Prime Minister, they fuck up poor people's lives"

"Oh crumbs"

They're just trying to work out which Tory donor is going to be awarded the £200million contract for filling just this one hole.

Douglas Hogg, aka Baron Hailsham these days.

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"Tories without the privilege"