Epic fail

I did an all-nighter on the Garries/Garys/Gary's before flying home from Brisbane to the UK after 3 years away back in 2006. Tried checking in whilst coming up on the last Gary. Bloke behind the desk asking me if I'm ok. Said I was feeling weird. Told me I couldn't fly. Said I was fine. Then he told me my bags were overweight and that I needed to put all of my heavy shit in my hand luggage and the light-stuff in the hold bag. Confused as fuck, I asked if they were going on different planes, he said no. I followed his instructions anyway.

Got on the plane. Passed out after a while. Woke up on the tarmac in South Korea for the stopover. Went to collect my hold bag. Waited for an hour. Asked an airport employee. He told me my bag was staying on the plane. I was wearing shorts and a hoody. There was snow on the ground. My carry-on bag was full of shoes and nothing else. Fuck's sake.

Got to the subsidised 5 star hotel that came with the cheap ticket. They told me the stopover was 3 nights not one. Come down really kicking in now. I'm penniless and hoping to surprise my parents who thought I was never coming home so don't want to ring them on the beg. The airport staff took pity on me and let me help myself to the lunch and evening buffets after the rest of the guests were finished with them.

So I became a sort of hotel Golum figure for 3 days, skulking in the shadows waiting for the buffets to quieten down before scurrying off with whatever was left. I had to wash my clothes in the sink and live in the robe until they dried. Got to rotate my footwear at least. Watched BBC news all day. Failed in numerous bids to chat up the waitresses.

I can't help but wonder if the guy at the check in desk was just stitching me up or if there was logic to his instructions.

Either way, precious memories.