I hate

between 5 and 5 and a half inches?

No.
Beans, ketchup, cream of tomato soup = Heinz

Fuck. ing. Right.

Smaller when it is cold?

Slightly more than a stack of buttons

Also cream of chicken soup.

Anyone who attempts to make their own version of any of this stuff is wasting their time as the perfection they are aiming for already exists.

cream of chicken soup

A food item where 2 of the first three nouns are not present. Murky, dishwater tasting substance made with a light sprinkle of industrial chicken flavouring. Truly, an affront to food.

The Heinz version is 3% chicken. There is more water but you would kind of expect that for soup.

You bolster my argument good sirrah. I thank you.

3% isn't that bad considering that a supermarket liquid chicken stock is 6% chicken.

Heinz Cream of chicken bile is just reconstituted chicken foot mucus in a tin.
Fucking disgusting unfood

True, but you're stepping on people's nostalgia. Whatever the contents, it tastes of their childhood.

But harsh on chicken feet there. We buy bags of them to thicken up stocks and gravy.

I don't wish to start an argument but Heinz disagree with you. Both chicken and cream are present and correct.
https://www.heinz.co.uk/soup/classic/product/100185200098/cream-of-chicken

The French don't understand the concept of soups containing meat. You can have vegetables or fish, or you can fuck off to the foreign foods aisle where Intermarché will be happy to relieve you of €1.80 for a tin of Heinz that was clearly produced for the Francophone market, rather than imported from the UK.

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Autoconnect.

Heinz beans are foul. Thin, insipid, oversweet shite. Suma beans all the way

The French don't understand the concept of soups containing meat.

I don't think I've ever had a French soup that wasn't chicken or beef broth-based.

On topic

Onion soup. Vile.

Also conference calls with varying time zone. I have lunch at 12 every day and now I have to have it at 130, not a huge change but I borderline shakes with hunger now.

Noooo! One of life's greatest simple pleasures! With a huge crouton covered in Gruyere. Oof.

Out of curiosity, is there anybody else here other than me who has literally never eaten a food that they find disgusting?

Don't get me wrong, I've got preferences but not once in my life have I tried something that I could not eat.

From steamed chicken feet, to yak butter tea to rabbit intestine stew. I find it really hard to get my head around anybody finding a conventional foodstuff "vile". Not first choice, sure. Inebibly vile? Nope.

Maybe I'm broken and the part of my brain that deals with unpleasant tastes just never developed!

Or is it a language thing and I take words like vile or revolting too literally?

Both chicken and cream are present and correct.

Ingredients are listed in descending order of proportion in the final product.

Chicken is second on the list at 3% and cream is 5th. The assertion that either are major components does not really stand up to closer scrutiny.

https://youtu.be/dPJvh_3NWRo?t=32

I’ll eat pretty much anything presented as food. But whether it tastes nice is a secondary thing to the fuel value.