Royalty

I remember that morning as one of the last times I ever got a massive piece of news from the front page of a newspaper.
Went to corner shop first thing for milk and a paper and "holy shit!"

It's what she would have wanted?

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Are we colonising Russia now?

Wow...yeah...good point. I remeber picking the paper up from the doormat and seeing the news.

For what I’ve heard so far today the BBC might as well close all its broadcasting sites and just repeatedly transmit the national anthem followed by two minutes of quiet sobbing

At least you can watch Stewart Lee's snowflake tornado on the iplayer

All that lot outside Buck Palace need to take a good hard look at themselves. Dumb giddy pricks.

I'm enjoying 6 music today. No wittering DJs, just music.

Theresa May shared an anecdote of a picnic at Balmoral where she
dropped some cheese in front of the late monarch.

May told MPs in the House of Commons:

I remember one picnic at Balmoral, which was taking place in one of
the bothies on the estate. The hampers came from the castle, and we
all mucked in to put the food and drink out on the table.

I picked up some cheese, put it on a plate and was transferring it to
the table. The cheese fell on the floor. I had a split-second decision
to make.

She went on:

I picked up the cheese, put it on the plate and put it on the table. I
turned round to see that my every move had been watched very carefully
by Her Majesty the Queen.

I looked at her. She looked at me and she just smiled. And the cheese
remained on the table.

The Queen was “quite simply the most remarkable person I have ever
met”

That's the shittest story I've ever read.

Turns out I'm pretty remarkable.

What were you expecting from Theresa "Fields of Wheat" May?

The house was reduced to helpless mirth, ITV reckon.

Charles 3rd is cockney rhyming slag.
Polished

I was high as a kite at a friends place watching weird mondo movies when the vhs stopped and it went to live broadcasting about Diana’s crash. My friend used to do visuals for nightclub Chillout rooms so we then had to record the Diana death stuff to be cut into videos of mens cum faces, sporting accidents and other weird shit. He did like to fuck with peoples heads.

Wondering about Swim Serpentine next weekend since that is in a Royal Park.

I could do with it being postponed as I'm way behind on my training...

Couple of BC races were cancelled this weekend, which is fine as I have some form of non-covid lurgy.

Unrelated, and I've no idea how to retell this story without sounding like a right twat so:
We were looking at places to live not so long ago, and there was one where there was a massive print of this (queen, eyes closed) over a loo.
We thought it was ace, so copied it, and put a small print of the same in our tiny loo.

Something about her seeming distaste at you having a pee makes me chuckle.

Not sure what to do with it now, makes us look like royalists, which adds to the overall irony.

Own up, which one of you was this?

I'm going to be honest, this definitely feels like personality cult from an outsiders' perspective

The choirboys seem impressed by St Paul's organ:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1CFPcpVeRWU

Justin Welby's crucifix of nails is pretty hardcore

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I only count 3, Jesus must've crossed his legs.

One nail through the ankles is how it was done, I believe.

I thought it was a nail through each hand and then you just have to stand on a small perch so you have to support your own body weight.

Ankles seems like you'd need a mega long nail, no? Feet stacked on top of each other and through the top is how I remember most crucifixes...

It has been an awfully long time since I crucified somebody so I'll bow to your superior knowledge.

look, i'm here for lizard lols not crucifixion chat, can we move on, please?