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  • Button-up fly. God knows shopping is tedious enough if you are one of those people who is miss-proportioned enough to struggle to find the right sized clothes on a rack. But then, joy of joys, there’s a pair of trousers that’s the right material, colour, cut and size so you grab it quick, and travel smugly home only to find, AAARRRRGGGG! its got a bloody button-up fly! THE most clumsy, arse-clenchingly crap way to release and cage your wanger thats ever been invented. Every bladder evacuation takes ten minutes longer than it should and several other urinators have been and gone to the adjacent porcelain (every one of them glad that they are not as pissed-clumsy as you are) before Percy is back in his curly nest.

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