Does anyone know anything about gardening?

And also needs accessorising with an inflatable hot tub and B&M furniture

looks shit

Idk.

I've definitely seen a lot of shit looking stuff, but I've also seen plenty of good eg.

As a fun way to cheat up the floor of a light well/basement in a Georgian London terrace.

Underneath some large trees next to a drive a bit like this

There were plenty of flowers in the bed, plus the trees. But obviously the trees prevented grass growing properly or the cba to mow outside the front of a house (something I can totally empathise with and one of the reasons I keep vetoing grass at the front when my OH suggests it.

Ultimately it's a bit like a pergola, fine if used tastefully and correctly.

Edit: but just to state for the record my preference would always be something plant based.

One thing I do wonder about where people do full lawns is whether their kids get astro burns?

Nobody should consider artificial grass.

Agreed. However, a tiny patch with loads of footfall is just about tolerable.

That's what I was pondering. Not sure what will happen with the existing grass there (and how to stop it blowing/washing away at the start).

Oh dear - that didn't work did it ? 🙄

This is my lawn ...

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Is there anything special you do to have something like this?

Lol

Is there anything special you do to have something like this?

No. It is a communal garden that I am now responsible for. Previously mown to within a millimetre of its life by contract ' maintenance gardeners'.
Very poor stony soil and rather than try and eradicate the naturalised 'weeds' I let them do their thing. When I do mow I create these islands so it looks deliberate and the building management company can see its not been neglected.
Resident humans and wildlife all happy 😇

Nice, lots of good stuff in there. Sorry, it wasn’t clear if you were genuinely advocating for plastic grass or not, and I hate it so much I felt it was worth the clarity! Your patch looks ideal.

I've never seen it used 'well' as far as I can recall. It's always folks that can't be arsed with a lawn so throw a bit down in a half-arsed manner. Maybe that's just round here. I'd rather see decking or paving, tbh.

https://www.clsscotland.com/artificial-grass-indoors/

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We had some artificial grass meeting rooms at a previous company, complete with plastic flowers.

We had a picnic on it once!

That's quite fun.

In my euro millions home a third of the kids play room would be that. Along with a bouldering wall all around.

I remember the Bricklayers Arms , Shoreditch circa 1996 - vicki decided to lay real turf through the whole ground floor of the pub . Watching euro 96 and getting lashed then going downstairs to smoke and drink more ale on the grass was brilliant...
Astrotruf would've been shite

We had a picnic on it once!

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Anyone have any experience pruning wisteria?

We inherited some on a house we bought in late autumn; previous owners told us to prune it in late summer and in March, which we’re now a bit late for - it seems to be growing quite a bit, do we give it its ‘late winter’ prune now or is it too late + better just to leave it be?

Wisteria are tough so if you really want to prune it now, I don't think it'll be a problem.

Alternative is to wait until it has flowered and then do the prune; that can also stimulate another flush of flowers, too.

Can you plant pumpkin seeds fresh from a pumpkin?
A friend just gave us a massive Crown Prince and I’d like to save and plant the seeds.

Probably. I'd dry them out first - fresh ones might rot?

Interesting, thanks! We had convinced ourselves of the opposite given our instructions were all about getting it right to get two blooms - might try a light prune now since it’s a bit late, then again late summer.

The flowering buds are very obvious, you can prune the buggery out of the rest of it multiple times in the year to keep it in shape.

Anyone recommend a good garden picnic bench - all in one type thing. Think we’re finally calling time on the one that’s been ‘on the way out’ for the past 5 years.

We got one of these 1st lockdown (I missed the pub) and haven't looked back. Will easily get 20-30 years out of it if not more. Quick wipedown every spring.

https://www.robertdyas.co.uk/nbb-junior-medium-150cm-recycled-plastic-picnic-table-brown

Cheers 👍🏽