I hate

It's sticky biscuit as you bloody know full well!

*skun

Trifle is lovely done right. Boozy sponge made properly, nice jelly with fruit in, proper custard.

A supermarket trifle is pretty abysmal.

People on the train who don’t close the toilet door behind them

The first four words were sufficient.

I deboned a chicken earlier in the week, and we talked about whether the cats could wear it as meat pyjamas...

ROFL copter has landed......

Businesses and / or tradespeople that insist on being 'cash only'.

Pay your tax you cunts.

Tapas.

Edit: in this country.

I mean, yeah, but of all the people in this country who don’t pay tax, a few tradesmen aren’t the ones fucking things up for the rest of us

Having to be that person explaining to a group of people it’s the quiet carriage on the train so please don’t play music or videos out loud.

Tapas

Fucking. A.

It's so diametrically opposed to everything that makes Tapas/similar good in Spain.

Tapas.

Edit: in this country.

With you on this in the main, but have you given any of the Portuguese options in Stockwell a shot?

I hate the whole ‘small sharing plates served when they’re ready’ concept lots of restaurants have adopted.

It nearly always comes across as ‘we want to turn these tables in 90 mins max’.

This sounds like something you would fucking love doing...

I know what you mean, but sometimes it works well. The Swing in West Hampstead does a really good sharing menu which is 8 dishes:
https://www.theswing.london/swingmenu
So you don't have to go through the BS of choosing a load of little dishes either.

I feel much more comfortable with 'food arrives when it's ready'.

Portuguese options in Stockwell

Bit far for me, but next time I'm down that way never say never.

Problem has always been paying 2 to 3 x cost of a meal for what amounts to about 1/4 of a meal. Having to go eat elsewhere afterwards defeats the object of going in the first place. I don't want an experience I want sustenance.

If I’m eating nice food, I want it to be ready when I’m ready. That’s for the professionals in the kitchen and wait staff to work out.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JvsWibR_nsk

(think I might have seen this On Here originally)

explaining to a group of people it’s the quiet carriage on the train so please don’t play music or videos out loud.

and having to listen to someone spending half an hour explaining on their phone that they will "have to go now" as they are in a quiet carriage and someone is giving me funny looks ...

Just saying it's not universally disliked! It also saves trying to communicate whether I want something as a starter, side or main if I know they're not waiting on anything.

One of the things I least miss from commuting. Although I did enjoy antagonising a group of German students blasting out trance on a ghetto blaster.

"Escuse me, does any of you speak English"

" Yes I speak some"

"Well turn that fucking thing off before I throw it and you through the window".

It was turned off and I actually got a round of applause from the rest of the carriage.

"Escuse me, does any of you speak English"

Were you after lessons?

Bit far for me, but next time I'm down that way never say never.

Problem has always been paying 2 to 3 x cost of a meal for what amounts to about 1/4 of a meal. Having to go eat elsewhere afterwards defeats the object of going in the first place. I don't want an experience I want sustenance.

Definitely worth a shot. Strong Portuguese community there and the food reflects it. A quick google for "Tapas Stockwell" will give you three options over 4.5/5 on Google reviews.

To be fair, I haven't been to any of them in at least 15 years so they might not be as good as they used to be.

I actually got a round of applause from the rest of the carriage.

And then everyone clapped?