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OK, yes - lots of things are different but not everything. It has been a common theme throughout history that the ruling classes have been more keen on war than poor people. It makes sense because the rich have more to lose - power, status, wealth, etc. The very poor have nothing to lose.
Until we get to the Chechnya scenario where it is a long war, then everybody loses. But that's what sending arms Ukraine makes more likely to happen.
So your question is why would people feel differently about the invasion and potential occupation and/or erasure of their own country than they would about a war being waged on another continent?