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I totally get that, and you're right of course - it's a shark pit for everyone - I think I'd just find it much easier to take if he was a bit more honest with us and said 'I'm not prepared to take it off the market and you'll have to take your chances'. At least we'd have had an accurate understanding of the situation. It's the relief of tension followed by the realisation that I was stupid to allow myself to feel that relief.
I understand your frustration, it is a really really complicated process and it seems has been even more tricky for you... but you might find something better (and cheaper) and be in a more proceedable position in the near future. There will be more properties for sale in spring/summer and, hopefully, that will turn the tables.
Also, try to see things from their perspective (difficult, I know) they might need the money, or simply got tired of waiting and unfortunately things are made to work in their favor (nothing is final until exchange)
If you are really keen on this place your best chance might be to reach completion asap, so try to speed the process up as much as you can. If they waited this long they are nor that bad and you might still have a fighting chance