• Michael Fabricant MP - aptly named for someone who’s job it seems is to make up shit on behalf of the prime minister

  • And whose syrup is clearly made by Dupont, rather than being harvested from anything natural...

  • At this stage I think it’s still too early to rule out the possibility that boris Johnson’s hair is beginning to aggressively colonise the heads of bald MPs in order to stay in positions of power.

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