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I’m trying to do a seriously demanding job myself and do all the childcare.
Sack one of these off or pay someone to look after the children so that you can do things for yourself that you need to do. If your wife is MIA between 8am and 10pm every day she will be earning mega bucks - enough to afford childcare.
If she isn't then you need to start asking some uncomfortable questions about what the two of you are doing.
The nature of my wife’s job means she’s basically MIA from 8am - 10pm and so I’m trying to do a seriously demanding job myself and do all the childcare.