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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YRGt724BkOo
First result for "subaru legacy key stuck in ignition" - seems like it's common across all the models
Your Google fu(baru) is much better than mine! Home safe and sound now, just gotta figure out where to take it tomorrow... The local Subaru garage will destroy my bank account, I know this...
Battery is in good health, I think it's the immobiliser in the barrel... We shall soon see!
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