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I don't disagree with this actually. Ramming someone off their bike causing injury and threatening them with a machete must carry some pretty serious charges. The risk vs reward ratio is all wrong - there's a reason organised crime gangs have moved into fly tipping (risk of a few fines is pretty low risk vs the profit potential). If the idiots are going to risk some very hefty criminal charges then they might as well go all in and steal things of higher resale value.
I don't think you're being entirely serious but bike shops have CCTV, alarm systems, staff who could raise the alarm while you were intimidating other staff, customers who might walk in mid-robbery complicating things, passers by who might call the police, mechanics who fancy their chances (I've got quite a few friends who are mechanics and I'm not saying they'd take on someone waving a machete around but they would definitely be much less of a pushover than your average desk jockey MAMIL on their own, outside, in lycra)...